Psalm 127:3. “Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is His reward.”
I. EXPECTATIONS FROM PARENTS THAT WE HAVE ENCOUNTERED IN OUR SCHOOL.
- That my child will learn academically.
- That my child will be reformed.
- That my child will be in the honor roll.
It is alright that parents will have expectations. But their expectations of teachers should match their commitments as parents.
- That my child will receive awards.
- That my child will be exempted from some rules.
II. WHERE WE PARENTS LOSE OUR WAY.
From: PASSIONATE PARENTING, by Cary Schmidt.
- WE GET TOO BUSY.
- WE DON’T KNOW ENOUGH, AND WE GET INTIMIDATED.
- WE FIND IT HARD TO SWALLOW OUR PRIDE.
- WE DO TEND TO FOCUS ON EXTERNALS AND BEHAVIOR
- WE GET TIRED AND WEARY.
- WE SOMETIMES BELIEVE THAT PROVIDING THE RIGHT ATMOSPHERE MAKES UP FOR OUR FAILURES.
- WE FORGET THE POWER OF OUR MODEL.
Don’t tell me – show me.
Don’t demand it – display it.
Don’t push me – lead me.
III. REMINDERS FOR THE PARENTS.
- They are the first and primary teachers.
- They are biblically mandated.
Deuteronomy 6:6-7. “And these words which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.”
Proverbs 22:6. “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
Ephesians 6:4. “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
- Character is more important than intellect and talent.
Proverbs 19:18. “Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.”
Proverbs 22:15. “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.”
Proverbs 23:13. “Withhold not correction from the child…”
Proverbs 29:15. “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.”
Proverbs 29:17. “Correct thy son and he shall give the rest…”
If the parents refuse to discipline, I believe it is more on weakness of the parent than love for the child.
It’s okay to want your children to be successful, but don’t let success be a substitute for their values. It’s easy to show off about caliber, but what’s really important is their character.
I know so many people who have skills, strengths, and qualifications, but struggle to build meaningful relationships, bonds, or get through tough times. Comparing your children’s achievements doesn’t improve your relationship with them. It is important for your kids to be academic, but it is more important for them to have empathy and compassion. And it is important for them to have intellectual ability, but today, it is even more valuable for them to have emotional intelligence.
And remember this, your worth is not defined by your kids’ bank balance. Your parenting is not validated by their test scores.
Your success is not based on the car they drive. And your future is not based on how others see them. Even if people think your kids are highly accomplished, it makes no difference to your life. It may give you a minimal ego boost, or make you feel confident for a moment, but what’s truly going to matter is the relationship you have with them.
If money, fame, and power didn’t exist, would you be happy with who your children are? Would you be grateful for how they turned out? Because what we are doing right now is we are covering up our insecurities with their success. We’re covering up our personal challenges with what they’ve achieved.
Ultimately, you know deep down, inside your heart that the only thing that truly matters is how much you love them and how much they love you. – JAY SHETTY.